Got bombshell?: I'm smarter than your average criminal.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

I'm smarter than your average criminal.

Apparently, the new big thing amongst crooks, thieves, men who don't treat me well and the like is to go to a Texas Rangers' game (or something like that), break into cars with GPS systems, hit 'home' and go rob you. Kind of smart. They know you won't be there for like 5 hours. They probably have your garage-door opener.
I was thinking about getting a GPS, actually. Only, instead of my address in the 'home' spot, I'm going to put in the address to my closest police station. Eat THAT, common criminals!
(PS: does this criminal-guy's bag up here say "swag?" Or is it something I'm not figuring out? Like, he's stealing someone's swag? That's one trendy, rapper of a robber.)

1 comment:

Stacie said...: I don't own a gPS system and I live in a dusty old town that has nothing in it, but this is really good info! I"ll have to inform everyone I know.; June 23, 2009 at 8:32 PM

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Pet peeves

The expression "kick (my, your, his, her) trash." You've probably NEVER heard that if you aren't mo. It's akin to "kick (my, your, his, her) butt."
Songs that tell a story (esp. ones that start and end with the same sentence, usually of the country genre)
the phrase "as per usual"
that Nicholas Cage Still has a career, should have ended after "Raising Arizona"
the question "what can I do you for?"
the glare of the sun off cars in mid-day
tights with open-toed shoes
cell phones in public
mis-uses of the words 'there,' 'their,' 'they're' (and similar grammatical errors)
counting new $1 bills

My Favorite Lyrics

"And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had..." (from "Mad World by REM)
"Not a day goes by I don't think about you. You left your mark on me it's permanent, a tattoo... Think about you and that long ride, I bite my nails, I get weak inside. Reach over and turn off the light, oh my baby."(from "Right in Time" by Lucinda Williams)
"Moved to the west coast away from everyone, She never told me that you called, Back when I was still, I was still in love"(from "Landed" by Ben Folds)
"Your lip is cut on the edge of her pleated skirt" (from "Blue Alert" by Madeline Peyroux)
"You can't resist her. She's in your bones. She is your marrow, and your ride home." (from "Only in Dreams" by Weezer)
"I feel like a ghost who's trying to move your hands over some ouija board in the hopes I can spell out my name." (from "Invisible Ink" by Aimee Mann)
"I don't need a better thing, I'd settle for less. It's another thing for me, I just have to wander through this world, alone." (from "Lose You" by Pete Yorn)
"I know someday you'll have a beautiful life, I know you'll be the sun in somebody else's sky, why, why, why can't it be mine?" (from "Black" by Pearl Jam)
"I know the last page so well, I can't read the first. So, I just don't start, it's getting worse" (from "Inside of Love" by Nada Surf)
"You can get what you want or you can just get old" (from "Vienna Waits for You" by Billy Joel)