Shoes! Shoes! Shoes!

My main quote used to be: "It's shoes or it's love, and I choose shoes." -Me
I have gone through my insanely large collection of shoes, and have taken some out. They are still fabulous (mostly), but I just don't wear them. No room in the rotation. They are my "D Team," as Pauly would say. So, here they are girls, if any of them are cool enough to grace your gorgeous feet, let me know and you can have a supervised visit.
They are mostly size 8 1/2, some 9s. Get ready for my "J Peterman" worthy descriptions, too. Since I could not figure out how to truncate just this post, sorry to the rest of you who have to be subjected to my shoes. I figured I may as well make it entertaining.


A dusty aqua shoe for a horse-race attending lady, as british as they are delicious. May be worn with a wide-brimmed hat. Nine West aqua leather mule, good condition, $6


If Michael Jackson wore coral, he would always wear these strappy pumps, complete with delicate silver chains. I, however, only got to wear them once during our time together.
Baker's coral heel, worn once, $7

My only Marc Jacobs (tear), these Dr. Scholls inspired clogs feature jewel-green satin the same color as the eyes of the gorgeous australian man you spent four days with in Morocco in 1999.

Marc Jacobs wood and satin clog, some damage to wood toe, $5

An ode to 40's glam and the linen-clad, these platform canvas pumps ooze preppiness. You can play tennis and attend a luncheon in these, all the while flirting clandestinely with the gardener.

"American Eagle" canvas pump, never worn, $8

I always thought Carrie Bradshaw might wear these, on a casual day. With a yellow sundress and giant sunglasses, and a brilliantly color-streaked scarf over her hair. And, of course I love the cherries!
Report embroidered slides, worn twice, $5


The bow on my mock-croc pumps made me feel like a character in "The Great Gatsby," though ever so slightly less forlorn. And for those in the know, crocodile is to be reserved for sport and travel.

Jeffrey Campbell mock-croc and grosgrain open-toe pumps, worn twice, $10

These stern, yet supple square-toed slingbacks are perfect for a hot librarian before, or after, she takes her hair out of the proverbial bun.

Nine West leather sling-backs, worn once, $8

Pink and kahki intertwine in a casual, sporty tenny. Perfect for the jungles of Burma, or any old day when comfort is a must. Must love dogs.

Rocket Dog tennies, worn several times (hey, they are comfy!), $4

A refreshing perk of the dorothy-inspired pumps is that they jingled, merrily, making her feel somewhat like a pirate when she walked.

Jeffrey Campbell red patent pumps, worn a few times (a couple of scuffs), $6

Pink and black, how very eighties! Molly Ringwold wishes.

Rocket Dog black and grey sneakers with pink, worn a handful of times, $8

The rounded toe and flat heel made me feel young again! In fact, I found myself strangely drawn to the playground, and rode the merry-go-round for an hour!

Rampage flats, moss green, worn a few times, $5

If she were in Catmandu again, she would don these aqua seqin thongs. Being in Greenland, however, the sight of the flip-flops made her very nostalgic indeed. She sighed over her hot chocolate, blowing a momentary frost onto the window.

Old Navy flip-flops, leather with sequins, never worn, $4

She turned around and bumped strait into Jon Bon, who smiled and asked if she had been the recipient of any good serenades lately. He then dedicated to her a new power ballad he called "Josie."

Gianni Bini hot pink heels, criss-cross front, zipper back, worn several times, but don't have damage, $5

Metallic green mary janes remind me of being caught in the rain. No, make that acid rain.

Dollhouse kitten heels, worn thrice, $10

When she asked if she could have them, I admonished, "no, Avril, no! Remember? I told you, you can only dress skater-y every once in a while if you're going to be taken seriously as an artist."

Vans white and kelly green sneakers, worn a few times, $8

Roman? Yes. From a totally lame store? Yes. Incredibly sexy on real feet (i.e.: mine, or, ahem, yours)? Heck yes.
Wet Seal brown gladiator sandals, worn a couple times, $5

You will think I am lying, but I swear I have gotten an alarming amount of male compliments on these shoes. My Michael Kors? They couldn't care less. Go figure.

Guess slides, fabric and leather, comfy, worn several times, but still pretty cute, $5

Remind me to tell you the story of the girl who was in so much pain from shopping in four-inch heels that she bought, and wore these Diesels with a little black dress. In public. And yes, somehow one is a half-size bigger than the other. Never bothered the girl. She was desperate.

Diesel slip-ons, creme and grey, worn several times (with jeans), once with a little black dress, $4

A good polka-dot shoe is paramount in any collection. Don't worry, I'm keeping the black-and-white polka dot pumps.

Chinese Laundry satin green polka-dotted sandals, worn twice, $8

She remembered fondly the time these BCBG's strenghtened her position in a kung-fu battle. The heel, in the wrong (or right) hands, a weapon to reckon with.

BCBG platform t-strap sandal, leather, worn once, amazing heel, $10

The reflection of the sun off my patent leather loafers created a well-timed twinkle in my eye that charmed the aging but still delightful Paul Newman.

Unlisted, by the infallible Kenneth Cole black patent loafers, worn several times, $5

So, if any of these appeal to you, and you live near-by, give me a shout!